Embracing Resilience: Finding Strength in Discomfort
Hey friends, it’s Whit here. Today, we’re diving into a topic and an energy that I’ve been working on for quite some time: resilience. And specifically, I want to explore why so many of us avoid discomfort—whether physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual—and how leaning into those uncomfortable moments can be one of the most transformative things we ever do.
Let’s be real: discomfort isn’t exactly anyone’s favorite guest at the party. It can show up uninvited, bringing awkward silences and those deep, squirmy feelings we’d rather avoid. But what if discomfort wasn’t something to be feared? What if it’s not here to ruin your day but to teach you something profound about yourself?
The Discomfort Dilemma: Why Do We Avoid It?
I’ve observed that a lot of people are quick to “clear” difficult emotions, thoughts, or circumstances or push away challenging situations. It’s like we’ve been conditioned to avoid pain at all costs. Think about it—how often do you:
Distract yourself with a screen or a snack when you’re stressed?
Brush off sadness by saying, “I’m fine,” instead of digging into what’s underneath?
Energetically clear something that you don’t like?
The truth is, most of us have learned to view discomfort as the enemy. But why?
Fear of the Unknown: What will you uncover if you sit with your discomfort? Maybe it’s a truth you’ve been avoiding, a memory you’ve buried, or a belief that no longer serves you. The fear of what’s on the other side can feel paralyzing.
Lack of Trust: You might worry you’re not strong enough to handle what you find. “What if it’s too much?” That’s a big one and I’ve felt it too.
Missing Tools: Many of us simply don’t know how to sit with discomfort. We haven’t been taught the tools to process challenging emotions or face obstacles with curiosity instead of dread.
My Story: Leaning In
A few years ago, I went through a particularly challenging time. Emotions were bubbling up that I didn’t want to deal with. Anger, grief, shame—all the big ones. My instinct was to push them away, distract myself, and energetically clear them like I’d been taught. But something shifted when I asked myself a simple question:
What if I leaned in instead of running away?
So, I did. I sat with my discomfort. I journaled through the anger. I cried through the grief. I asked, “What are you here to teach me?” And slowly but surely, I began to see those difficult feelings as messengers, not enemies. They weren’t there to hurt me—they were guiding me toward deeper healing and resilience and ultimately, more of me.
Ancient Wisdom: Discomfort as a Path to Growth
Indigenous and ancient cultures often viewed discomfort as a sacred part of the human experience. For example:
The Vision Quest: In many Native American traditions, young people would go on vision quests—solitary journeys into the wilderness designed to challenge their minds, bodies, and spirits. These experiences weren’t about comfort; they were about growth, self-discovery, and connecting with their inner strength and the divine.
Stoicism and the Greeks: Ancient Stoic philosophers like Epictetus and Marcus Aurelius believed in embracing discomfort as a way to build character and wisdom. They taught that challenges are opportunities to practice virtues like patience, courage, and resilience.
These practices remind us that discomfort isn’t something to be avoided—it’s something to be honored.
Modern Science: The Resilience Brain
Science backs up what ancient wisdom already knew: leaning into discomfort strengthens our resilience. Here are a few fascinating insights:
Neuroplasticity: Your brain is like a muscle—it grows through challenge. Studies show that when you face and overcome difficulties, your brain creates new neural pathways, making you more adaptable and resourceful over time.
The Stress Sweet Spot: Research highlights the concept of “eustress,” or positive stress. Unlike chronic stress, eustress helps you grow. Think about the soreness after a good workout or the nerves before a big presentation—it’s uncomfortable, but it’s also where the magic happens.
Emotional Regulation: Studies from the field of psychology reveal that avoiding emotions often amplifies them. When you suppress feelings, your body holds onto the stress, which can lead to physical and emotional burnout. Learning to sit with and process emotions actually reduces their intensity over time.
The Stats Speak: According to a 2021 study published in Frontiers in Psychology, people who actively face their fears and discomfort have higher levels of life satisfaction and emotional well-being compared to those who avoid challenges.
Practical Tips for Building Resilience
So, how do we stop running from discomfort and start embracing it? Here are some tools to help:
Get Curious: Instead of thinking, “Why is this happening to me?” try asking, “What is this here to teach me?” Curiosity can transform fear into growth and shift from victim to empowered.
Start Small: You don’t need to dive into your deepest fears all at once. Start with manageable challenges, like sitting quietly with a mild frustration or trying a new activity that feels slightly outside your comfort zone.
Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself as you navigate discomfort. Remind yourself that growth is messy and it’s okay to struggle.
Journaling: Write down what you’re feeling and what it might be pointing to. Journaling is a safe space to explore emotions without judgment. The Adventure Within Journal is a great place to start.
Body Awareness: Tune into your physical sensations during moments of discomfort. Where do you feel it? Breathe into that space, letting your body know it’s safe to experience what’s coming up.
Celebrate Small Wins: Every time you face discomfort instead of avoiding it, celebrate! Recognize the courage it takes and the strength you’re building.
The Gifts of Discomfort
Discomfort isn’t here to break you—it’s here to build you. It’s the workout for your emotional and mental muscles, the call to look deeper and grow stronger. When you lean in, you discover resilience you didn’t know you had.
So the next time discomfort knocks on your door, don’t shut it out. Instead, invite it in, pour it a cup of tea, and ask, What do you have to teach me? Because on the other side of discomfort is your greatest strength—your unshakable, radiant resilience.
Let’s keep growing together, friends. As always, love to you, wherever you are on your journey.
*I HIGHLY recommend checking out Native and Indigenous sources to do a deeper dive into the topic covered. The very short paragraph included here has the intention to bring awareness to this perspective, but not speak for it. Please check out more in depth information directly from the source!
